Week 4 - Re-Engage
The New 3Rs of Retirement
Good day to you. Hope you had a good week. I'm sorry this has taken so long. Sadly, I'm not completely done.
However, I wanted you to have a start on the assignment for our next session. I've included the videos I've prepared so far.
Step 1: Exceptional Experiences
Exceptional Experiences are kin to icing on the cake. They add something tasty to the same old, same old.
While there are no guarantees, adding the elements suggested here might help create that appreciated add-on.
Besides, it takes effort to plan and execute exceptional experiences. That effort and time by themselves are the
already an unexpected bonus. That makes trying to create such an experience an engaging alternative to work.
Step 2: More Surprises
Just because you may have navigated through the surprises that awaited you early in retirement doesn't mean you
you are done! Here is one that caught me unawares. Hope it helps you prepare.
Step 3: Who do you want to become?
Life doesn't stand still. We're always faced with the question "Who do you want to be when you grow up." There is no reason to assume the question will
go away just because you retired. Here are a couple of videos that encourage aspirations about the kind of person you could be.
At this Toastmaster meeting I got to talk about my grandson and all three things he taught. The one you haven't heard yet is persistence.
While you're at it, here's an article:
What Your Grandkids Can Teach You
Mattielyn, don't give up on this. You don't need your own grandkids; borrow mine for a bit. He might teach you too!
Step 4: Better decisions
Retirement requires skills. You may have been challenged to practice and learn these previously.
You and I make decisions all the time but have you ever thought about what could go into making better decisions? I suggest you spend a little of your retirement doing exactly that.
Step 5: When hobbies fail
The concepts in this video can be used to help "expand" a hobby. Some of the techniques can also be used with a skillset you may have. For example, you may be a good cyclist, singer, etc.
When you are shopping for "things to do in my retirement," some of the old favorites might still be in play.
Week 3 - Re-Create
The New 3Rs of Retirement
Step 1: Start this session's reflection by examining your notes so far. This video may help. It talks about what I discovered when I took a closer look at where I came from.
This article might help as well: Mining the Past.
Re-Imagine is all about understanding what makes you you. This can include knowing more about where your current drivers and strengths came from.
The videos are still here. If you want, you can go back and watch any or all of them again.
Your reflection on work is not just about what you do but what meaning it holds. This "Cathedral" video might give you a frame of reference.
Whether your work held meaning or not, I encourage you to try and find activities in retirement that do hold significance for you.
As you begin to actually "do" retirement and not just "imagine" it, try to find why what you do is important. That's what Re-Creating is all about - a new start.
Step 2: Today we'll focus the things you really feel are worth pursuing.
Some things you might want to continue become unavailable. For example, while I did get back into taking pictures through a telescope, that activity only lasted a season. My friend sold his telescope and went on to other adventures. Luckily I was ready to move on.
No one thing may captivate your interest and sustain that interest over time.
For me it seems I can carry the ball for about 2 years and then I'm ansi to learn new things and move on. However, there is a category of things that I continue to come back to again and again. For me, it's doing projects: Setting a goal, figuring out how to get there, learning what I need to know to get there, working the plan, and evaluating the outcome.
The question for you? What are the things that really rock your boat, make your day, gets you out of bed in the morning?
The good news is that there are ways to separate the interesting things from the mundane. We're going to explore those a little.
Let's start by looking at two very important measures of what does seem important to you: Energize and Flow. Let's start by looking at two very important measures of what does seem important to you: Energize and Flow. Watch these with an eye toward who you are and what really Energizes you or puts you in a Flow state.
Make some notes this week. Keep a kind of journal that tracks what you do. Were there places in the week where you looked up and were surprised at the time? Did you get lost reading, viewing, talking?
Step 3: What else floats your boat? We are sneaking up on the topic of Re-Engaging. We'll kick that off by watching this video and talking about molding the activities ahead to be a little more exceptional.
Are you a story teller? By now you will have collected a variety of impressions of you and how you got here. Those things can be inspirational to some. Check out this article on stories. Where did your smile come from?
Week 2 - Re-Imagine
The New 3Rs of Retirement
Re-Imagine what retirement can mean and offer a new and improved version over what your parents, grandparents, or co-workers did.
Re-Create a new understanding of yourself as you explore a new profile of activity and meaning that stems from who you are and where you come from.
Re-Engage in a self-improved lifestyle that encourages curiosity, activity, empathy, and involvement that give meaning and purpose to your new life.
Step 1) Please watch these videos
Not all videos have exercises but be sure and do the exercises if they are suggested.
Step 2) Find out more about retirement from retirees you know.
Suggestion: Interview at least 2 retirees and quiz them about how their retirement is really going. We're not necessarily interested in how that cruise went or how the grandkids are as we are interested in what went wrong and what's going right.
Have you experienced any surprises?
Have you run out of things to do? If so, what did you do about it?
What has worked out well?
How has your retirement differed from what you thought it was going to be?
Go back to Chapter 1 of Retire-to Play and Purpose entitled "What They Don't Tell You at the Retirement Party." This chapter is full of stories about what retirees found surprising. It may even spark some questions you can use when you talk to others.
Don't stop interviewing. You can do this the rest of your life. Talk to people who've been there, who've walked the walk.
Step 3) Start re-imagining what you can do in retirement
Suggestion: You now have a handle on what "drives" you. In fact you have at least a top five. These five reflect who you've become. When you work, you got to do a series of activities that built on your drivers at the time.
The questions is, what are you doing now that speak to the top five now?
Watch the following video. It will give you a handle on
Just so you know, Jeri Sedlar gave Crys and me permission to use the "drivers" exercise when we do a New 3R's of Retirement course. You don't have to supply a purchase receipt.
Step 4) Prepare for our next session by thinking about what you've done
This "Re-Create" section is all about figuring out what to do in your retirement.
Suggestion: Let's explore the kinds of things that have been important to you in the past.
Take out pen and paper and divide it into six year increments:
1-6 7-12 13-18 19-24 and so on. Past 24, use 10 year increments.
The idea is to identify things that you did at that age which were important to you.That you were excited about. For example, at age 5 or 6 I bet you started school. Was that a favorite. My wife didn't get to get out as much as other kids but she did look out the window of her room and saw horses. Her memories of "thinking about horse-back riding" eventually propelled her into riding for nearly 50 years as an adult.
What are your memories?
That's probably enough to keep you busy until lesson 3.
Week 1 -
In our first week, you have 3 assignments:
Review the "Drivers" exercise. Do "Pass 1" ONLY - take your time. You can do the first pass quickly but take your time to review. It is important to ask yourself, "Do I see Mattielyn in this or not?" For example, I can see where a judge may very well value "Problem solving". Can you see you sharing that value?
We are going to spend a portion of your time each session dealing with the items on this list. Will the real Mattielyn please stand up?
Do you agree with Dr. Moynes?
Wath the "False Starts" and "False Expectations" videos